Sometimes the stress, anxiety or depression that we experience is because we have not forgiven certain people in our lives. When we remain angry, bitter and full of vengeance towards others it is basically poisoning us. We are also behaving as if we are God. We need to leave vengeance in God's hands because he is a righteous judge.
Rom 12:19 KJB
Dearly beloved, avenge not yourselves, but rather give place unto wrath: for it is written, Vengeance is mine; I will repay, saith the Lord.
As believers we ought to want to forgive others (even though it's not always easy to do) because Christ has forgiven us. We are forgiven of every sin - past, present and future. We should be so thankful for that! Thus, we should extend grace to others through forgiveness. Christ and His word in us gives us the strength and ability to truly forgive others.
Col 3:13 KJV -
13 Forbearing one another, and forgiving one another, if any man have a quarrel against any: even as Christ forgave you, so also do ye.
Eph 4:32 KJV -
32 And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.
Look at things properly
It can be difficult at times to forgive others especially when they do something shocking, illlegal, abominable or downright evil of cruel. What helps is to look at the person and their actions properly. Is the person an unbeliever? If so, then keep in mind that all that an unbeliever can do is sin. However, that doesn't mean that we condone what they did or that they shouldn't face any consequences for their actions or that they couldn't have chosen something different than what they did or said. We have to forgive them and then pray for them to be saved and to come unto the knowledge of the truth so that they will hopefully choose to believe and have eternal life but also will hopefully make better decisions in their lives with Christ and His word in them (if they become a believer). You might want to try sharing the Gospel with them if they are not contentious about it. Sadly, sometimes unbelievers do things to us specifically because we are believers or because they were offended by us sharing the Gospel.
If they are a believer, their actions were coming from their flesh. Do you ever have moments where you are walking after the flesh instead of in the Spirit? Yes, we all do! Understanding this can help you to forgive. Also, keep in mind that we will be spending all of eternity with fellow believers and we will all be great friends in the heavenly places without anymore sin. It will be glorious! We have much to be thankful for!
Sometimes we also can forgive others but then we need to set some clear and healthy boundaries with them, whether they are a believer or an unbeliever. Healthy boundaries are good in all relationships but may especially need to be set with people who are unhealthy to be around. You might even have to walk away from certain people. We can forgive, but that doesn't always mean having continual contact with that person. In fact, Paul talked about avoiding people who were contentious to the truth or who were violent and lived ungodly etc.
Rom 16:17 KJV -
17 Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.
1Co 5:11 KJV -
11 But now I have written unto you not to keep company, if any man that is called a brother be a fornicator, or covetous, or an idolater, or a railer, or a drunkard, or an extortioner; with such an one no not to eat.
Once we have forgiven others and are seeing things from a proper perspective based upon God's word rightly divided, it will help free us from the toxicity within us that comes from unforgiveness.
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