Chronic Illness and Homemaking
2 Corinthians 12:8-9
8 For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me.
9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
Can you be a Christian homemaker if you have chronic illness and pain? Yes! It won't always be easy and you will have to move at a different pace than other Homemakers but it can be done. Also, it's probably better for women with chronic illness and pain to be homemakers rather than working outside of the home because you can more easily go at your own pace rather than having to meet the demands of a work schedule and work environment, plus having to still manage your home and family at the same time.
As a woman with chronic illness, fatigue and pain myself, I thought that I would share a few helpful tips for being a homemaker with chronic illness, fatigue and pain.
1. Remember that your true identity is in Christ Jesus, not in the things that you do. You are accepted in the beloved. Yes, we have specific roles to fill while we are still here on earth, and we want to do things that are good and helpful to others, but you are identified now with Christ and completely accepted in Him even if you are physically limited.
2Co 5:17 KJB
17 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.
2. Our suffering isn't forever.
We will have perfect, eternal, glorified bodies like unto Jesus's glorified body at the rapture and will live with the Lord in the heavenly places forever. But, while we remain here we still have bodies that are subject to disease, old age and then death (if the rapture doesn't happen first). Unbelievers do not have this same hope. So, even though we, as believers, experience pain now, we are here as ambassadors for Christ to share the gospel with unbelievers and to allow Christ to live in and through us which shows God's love to others.
2Co 4:17 KJB
17 For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory;
Phl 3:21 KJB
21 Who shall change our vile body, that it may be fashioned like unto his glorious body, according to the working whereby he is able even to subdue all things unto himself.
Col 1:5 KJB
5 For the hope which is laid up for you in heaven, whereof ye heard before in the word of the truth of the gospel;
3. Give yourself grace
It's important to give yourself grace and not be hard on yourself especially when you are having flareups of your illness or pain. You are probably doing the best that you can and you can only do so much. Be gentle with yourself especially in how you speak to yourself.
Eph 1:6 KJB
6 To the praise of the glory of his grace, wherein he hath made us accepted in the beloved.
4. Prayer and Bible study is essential. Prayer and Bible study help to keep your mind renewed and your soul nourished by God's love and His word. Try to make time daily for Bible study and reading. If you are dealing with brain fog or other things that make it difficult to study on certain days (chronic illness, pain and fatigue can sometimes effect our ability to concentrate), just rest and pray on those days and then do your Bible studies on days when you can think more clearly. Ask a fellow believer to also pray for you on your more difficult days to help you get through it.
1Ti 4:13 KJB
13 Till I come, give attendance to reading, to exhortation, to doctrine.
1Th 5:17 KJB
17 Pray without ceasing.
Col 3:16 KJB
16 Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom; teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord.
5. Pace yourself and be patient; Don't get burned out; know your limits but do what you can. When you have a chronic illness and pain you know that if you push yourself too hard, it can lead to burn out or what is called "post-exertional malaise" which can leave you "out of commission" for several days or even weeks. One thing that is helpful is the spoon theory. I recommend looking into this as you might find it helpful (I'll include links in the description). If you can, try to do a little bit each day. On days that you feel better, do a little more but don't over do it either. To help prevent burnout, set healthy boundaries with others. You might have to turn down invitations so that you have more time and energy to just take care of your family at home. Find simple and easy things you can do regularly and try to stick with a homemaker schedule when you can - for example, do one load of laundry each day instead of doing it all in one day a week. Put the dishes in the dishwasher instead of washing by hand if that is easier for you. And yes, homemade meals are healthier but with chronic illness and pain it's OK to have some frozen, canned or boxed meals sometimes that are easier to make on your more difficult days or simply order take-out if you can afford it. You may need to let go of some perfectionism.
1Th 2:7 KJB
7 But we were gentle among you, even as a nurse cherisheth her children:
Rom 12:12 KJB
12 Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;
6. Dress up but dress comfortably. What I mean by this is that instead of wearing pj's and nightgowns all day everyday, find comfortable but modest t-shirt dresses, long but soft cotton skirts, soft sweaters and other clothing that is comfortable to wear. Look into house dresses. It might not be super fashionable but it's better than wearing pj's all day! Of course it's fine to wear your cozy pajamas, robe or nightgowns on your more difficult days, but it will help you to feel a little better about yourself if you can get a little more dressed up on other days. Fix your hair, brush your teeth and wash your face first thing every morning. Consider going makeup free or only wearing makeup very lightly (it's more modest, healthier for your skin and less expensive anyway). Also look into comfortable shoes and sandals that you could wear as well.
1Ti 2:9 KJB
9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
7. Keep a gratitude prayer journal and stay hopeful and optimistic. When dealing with chronic illness and pain it can be difficult sometimes to keep a more positive mindset, but keeping a gratitude and prayer journal can help you with this. Think of 3-5 things daily that you are thankful for. Also, write out some of your prayers too in a personal journal and cast your burdens on the Lord. Be careful as well regarding what you feed your mind. Don't spend your days watching traumatic news coverage, arguing with people online over politics, comparing your life to others on social media, watching too many worldly TV shows or movies, or other such things. Think on things that are good instead. Stay focused on God, His word and allowing Christ to live in and through you as a believer. Find more Christian friendly entertainment to enjoy as well.
Rom 15:13 KJB
13 Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.
Col 3:15 KJB
15 And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.
8. Remember that suffering teaches us patience, gives us experience and develops hope in our hearts. We become more patient in waiting for the Lord; and more patient with ourselves and others. We also can use our experiences to help others and encourage fellow believers because we have experienced similar issues. We then have hope in our hearts for the day of Christ. God also comforts us through His word in all our sufferings. Keep in mind as well that God works all things together for our good as believers. Remember also that God's grace is sufficient for us and he will help you to get through the difficult days.
Romans 5: 3-5
3And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience;
4And patience, experience; and experience, hope:
5And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.
2Co 1:3-4 KJB
3Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort;
4 Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God.
Rom 12:12 KJB
12 Rejoicing in hope; patient in tribulation; continuing instant in prayer;
Romans 8:28 KJB
28 And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.
